I ranted quite a bit on marriage on my 7th anniversary last year. I wrote a serious post on whether being married was worth it at all because of some friends' failing marriages. And I also went on to give gyan on lessons I learnt about marriage and that love, respect and shit like that keeps two people together. But since 8 is better than 7 and I am a year more qualified to dispense advice on the topic, I thought of busting some marriage myths. I'd like to thank everyone who've bombarded with questions and insinuations about married life - which are none of their business, in the last 8 years. You serve as my inspiration for this post.
1. Newly married people live in a scene out of your favourite romantic movie, with sexy negligees thrown in. Nope! You may find yourself with a woman with thunder thighs and find yourself struggling to even get through the act. So, yeah, it isn't actually how internet told you it is. So, while it may feel liberating to finally get a legal license to get down to business, it isn't all about mood lighting and kinky stuff.
2. Marriage is having an available sex partner for life. I don't know why all single people think that all married people are mandatorily having sex every night! And then there are innuendoes about what you did last night. Sorry to burst the bubble, my dear friends, but sex isn't a sure event sometimes even on anniversaries as years pass along. What's the point of getting married then, you ask? The love and togetherness shit I spoke about last year that takes the place of lust.
3. People married for 8 years should have a couple of kids. Moving on from the emphatically miserable intimate lives of married people, it seems like a given that if you are married for about 3 years, it's safe to ask your kid's name. (Kids' names, in case of more years). No, it's perfectly normal to be married for a few years and have no kids. And no, that does not give you the right to speculate about the medical condition of either spouses.
4. Every anniversary is a champagne popping occasion: This is for all friends who start jumping before even the people involved, to know the plans for the anniversary. As years go by, I think only people who did not hope to make it but made it are the ones who pop champagne bottles. The rest of us are ok with an impromptu dinner.
5. We are best friends: No You are not! Please find some one else to crib about your respective in-laws! This precious advice could save your marriage.
1. Newly married people live in a scene out of your favourite romantic movie, with sexy negligees thrown in. Nope! You may find yourself with a woman with thunder thighs and find yourself struggling to even get through the act. So, yeah, it isn't actually how internet told you it is. So, while it may feel liberating to finally get a legal license to get down to business, it isn't all about mood lighting and kinky stuff.
2. Marriage is having an available sex partner for life. I don't know why all single people think that all married people are mandatorily having sex every night! And then there are innuendoes about what you did last night. Sorry to burst the bubble, my dear friends, but sex isn't a sure event sometimes even on anniversaries as years pass along. What's the point of getting married then, you ask? The love and togetherness shit I spoke about last year that takes the place of lust.
3. People married for 8 years should have a couple of kids. Moving on from the emphatically miserable intimate lives of married people, it seems like a given that if you are married for about 3 years, it's safe to ask your kid's name. (Kids' names, in case of more years). No, it's perfectly normal to be married for a few years and have no kids. And no, that does not give you the right to speculate about the medical condition of either spouses.
4. Every anniversary is a champagne popping occasion: This is for all friends who start jumping before even the people involved, to know the plans for the anniversary. As years go by, I think only people who did not hope to make it but made it are the ones who pop champagne bottles. The rest of us are ok with an impromptu dinner.
5. We are best friends: No You are not! Please find some one else to crib about your respective in-laws! This precious advice could save your marriage.
These are at the top of my mind for now. I am sure more will occur to me later and I shall definitely come back to update you guys. Meanwhile, can you think of something that is a myth about marriage in your experience. Share it here and let's have a good laugh about it :)
Either anniversary is a champagne popping session :P Well not eight but only four, there is only one rule I have used so far- give space and take space. Rather demand it if not freely available :D
ReplyDeleteAnd one more... a holiday every anniversary. That is my excuse to convinc a baniya husband to travel more and more :P