The Losing Battle of Decluttering!

Starting today, I am on a 66-day daily writing challenge. But don't worry! you may not see me here every day because some days I might choose wot write work stuff and post on Linkedin. 

But why 66 days, you ask? Well! Research is always changing and the latest one that I came across said you need at least 66 days to create a habit. I think the 21-day research is old now! (Maybe they’ve changed the 10,000 hour rule too! Who knows!)

Any how! I just needed a reason, a motivation to get behind a habit and this seemed like a good enough reason. And like I said, I’ll be writing on various things - just to flex my creativity - plus also get some work done on some days. 

I am still not sure whether my goal is time based - 20 minutes a day - or words-tased - 1000 words a day. I think I’ll play that by the ear but make sure that it worthy of a challenge! 

And after 13 years of starting this blog, I am not even apprehensive about no one reading this post! I might just be putting out these words in the vast expanse of the internet where they’ll probably get lost as soon as they are posted, forever in pursuit of an audience but never finding any! 

And I am fine with that! The idea here is to get into the discipline of writing. And if any of you stumble onto this post and want to join me - no matter which day it is - hop on! Make this your day and continue till you hit day 66.

So what am I going to write about today?

I am going to write about something that’s on top of my mind. Something that all of you can relate to and identify with. Sorry to sound biased in the same week as we celebrated #breakabias but I am thinking women would know a little more about this than men. 

Running a household requires soo much of sorting and tidying!! 

As someone who’s been on a war against clutter for 14 years, I still don’t get how it stays undefeated. 

Well! Let’s start with the daily battle - the refrigerator. When I had to travel on short notice last year, one of the first things I thought of was dealing with the contents of the fridge.

When I was recuperating from surgery last year, my spouse realised that meal times aren’t dealt with by just ordering food. My being bed-ridden finally taught him what I really meant all the times I was complaining about leftovers in the fridge when he went ahead and ordered more. That was the time that he had to look into this frozen box and decide what can be used, tossed out or needed to be ordered. That is a BIG part of running a kitchen

And now, when I have been back to my duties as a housekeeper, one thing that keeps coming up and I hate to deal with is clearing out the fridge. 

What makes it more complicated is stuff that comes with home delivery food - and we do that a lot - tiny portions of salads no one will eat, chutneys that go straight into the bin, food that smells okay but is a few days old and doesn’t seem okay to consume. 

Next comes other stuff around the house - the dining table! I don’t think any middle class household ever used it for family meals. I have never seen that happen. It’s always the more refined and sophisticated that have that ritual. 

The rest of us just use it as a dumping ground. My mom’s. My sister’s. My house. And that is pretty annoying for someone like me who wants to have some semblance of order and neatness around my living quarters. Let me share the results of my constant endeavours - it can’t be done! (Maybe if people around are also as committed but I don’t live with such people - actually the opposite kind)

I am not even going to get into side tables and other surfaces. 

And now for the big ones - and also because we moved homes! 

Before that I want to talk about my personal efforts to minimise my things over the years - and how of it I am still stuck with. 

I think it is right to say that only a therapist can go deep into my obsession with throwing stuff out - the opposite of a hoarder. Maybe something to do with the fact that I have always lived with the latter kind.

Anyways, when we moved, all I needed was a couple of suitcases and a box for my shoes. I made sure that over the years clothes I didn’t fit into were given away, sarees I’d never use were also put to use as gifts, materials I’ll never goes stitched were passed on to my sister who could stitch or gift them. And this is how I have never retained anything that I wouldn’t be using. 

I do have one big stack of good stuff that I don’t fit into but is too good to be given away - and I do fit into some of it now. 

In fact, between my spouse and me, he is the shopper. He’ll buy duplicates and triplicates of things he already has. Bigger hard drives, extra tool boxes, more screw driver sets! Buying is gratification enough even if he never ends up using them! 

And despite all the not shopping and giving things away, there are stoles that I didn’t buy, are old and can’t be given away. There are scarves which were gifts - I don’t know why one year everyone I knew thought I was into scarves and I got like 4 that year. No, I don’t wear scarves. So there’s that brand new stack that I am not going to wear, don’t have people to gift to and can’t through in the orphanage bin. 

I also have leggings left but the kurtas are worn out. A warn sweat shirt here and there which can’t be worn in Mumbai. But can’t be thrown away either. I also haven’t been able to part with some formal pants which are good, I know I won’t fit them but I still can’t bring myself to toss them. 

So I guess despite all the pruning I have done over the years, you can see that the sea of stuff never diminishes! (I always shudder to think of people who change their wardrobe seasonally) And I have always been aware of how things accumulate - which is one of the reasons that I have never followed fashion and have stuck to things I know I will wear for sure. In fact, even then I am stuck with 4 skirts which probably will go to my nieces in the event of my death! 

And now coming to the worst category of all - things you won’t use, are ugly and you still can’t bring yourself to toss them. I have a big box of curtains that have been used for more than a decade and you can see that they’ve seen better days. But the amount of money spent on curtains makes me feel bad tossing them. 

Every time I look at a cluttered surface, it reminds of the losing battle I am fighting. Even though I am convinced that I’ll spend a life time and still won’t win, I can’t give up. Maybe it’s possible. Maybe…

What do you think? 

Excuse me! I have to clear out my fridge now!